Why Football Announcers are the Worst

I generally watch football games from the press box where it's silent, and that's the way I like it.

When I watch football on television, I find the announcers add almost zero insight to the game, and before long I mute them and watch the way I do in the press box. Without sound.

Here's a typical football broadcast.

The play-by-play announcer blurts out as much jargon and as many cliches as he can while the play is happening. His goal is not to help you understand what's going on, but to let you know he understands how to speak football and that he knows what a bubble screen is.

Then the play ends, and the color commentator immediately gives a 40-second biography on whoever did the best on that particular snap. If the running backs runs for 10 yards, you can bet the announcer will tell us where that running back went to school, when he got drafted and maybe even where he grew up. And the announcer doesn't actually know any of this information. Someone feeds it to him.

And the color commentator won't stop talking. He tries to cram as many words as he can into 40 seconds and often is still talking about the previous play when the next play starts.

Rarely does a commentator take you inside the mind of a coordinator and break down the chess match on the field. That's where I want to go. I want real-time analysis and criticism of the decisions the coaches make and the execution of the players, not instant biographies.

Too bad the announcers are terrified to analyze or criticize anyone.